Mom’s Amazing Purse Had Everything A Guy Would Ever Need!                

My Mom’s purse was a truly amazing thing. 

Regardless of what happened—bike  crash, splinter, bee sting, broken zipper, starvation, boredom, bubonic plague, nuclear explosion—her purse held exactly what was needed.

And Mom could retrieve whatever was needed in a heartbeat, even if she was cooking or driving or singing a hymn at Church, while simultaneously pinching the fire out of me for misbehaving.

By rights, Mom’s purse should have been the size of a Samsonite suitcase.

But somehow, her “every day” purse and her Sunday “Go-to-Church” purse were normal size on the outside but as big as the universe inside.

It was magic.

How else can you explain everything that her purse held: 

Half sticks of Wrigley’s spearmint gum, 10,000 Kleenex (some new, some with lipstick smudges; some slightly snotty; and one only to be used IN A DIRE emergency), sewing kit with needles and thread, tiny screwdriver for eyeglasses, ink pens, toy car and truck, car keys, eye drops and tweezers.

Band-Aids (all sizes), Neosporin, butterscotch mints, TG&Y spiral notebook, grocery lists, Safeway coupons, S&H green stamps, cinnamon and butterscotch mints, Blistex, postage stamps, magnifying glass, safety pins (all sizes), miniature golf pencil, Sonic Drive-in toy animals, and a piece of tailor’s chalk.

Small Tootsie roll, dry Nabisco crackers, Halloween-size roll of Lifesavers, cigarettes and lighter in her little holder thingee, throat lozenges, ChapStick, metal nail file, piece of string, fingernail clippers,  plastic rain bonnet, Gunn Brothers stamps, emery board, pair of white gloves (on Sunday), blue eye shadow and mascara plus...

#humor #momspurse #gumandpursedirt #halfstickofgum #usedkleenex #babyboomerhumor #oklahomahumor #simplertimes #momswerethebest

Comments

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.

Amazon Reviews

Sudie
Sudie
5/5

Just finished reading your book. I was laughing out loud so much my husband asked what was I reading! And I kept thinking, “Bless his mom's heart”! My dad also read it and said he found it delightful. Looking forward to the second book. Thanks for the entertainment!

4 months ago
Tktjtj
Tktjtj
5/5

Fantastic!

Fun and great read!!! If you grew up in the 60 and 70 you will be able to relate to many fun stories the author tells!
Bill Moore is a very talented and entertaining author with a great sense of humor! I highly recommend this book!!!

7 months ago
Susan B.
Susan B.
5/5

Couldn’t put it down. A total joy to read.

The author was a classmate of mine in high school, and is still a great Facebook friend. I knew this book would be awesome b/c of the way Bill writes his posts on Facebook telling his friends of his life in New Zealand. This book touched my heart in soo many ways. Bills writing is so descriptive, that in your mind you see what he’s writing about or transports you to the place. I couldn’t put it down. Bill, thank you for letting me go back to my days of innocence as a child in Norman, Oklahoma.

7 months ago
Debra
Debra
5/5

Having known the author all our lives I expected nothing less than stellar from him and he does not disappoint. It brought smiles and loud guffaws as I tripped down memory lane with him. It was so much more personal to me as I knew the characters in the book but all will enjoy reminiscing about that magical time in Norman . Give it a read you wont be disappointed!

3 years ago
ProudDad
ProudDad
5/5

I think anyone who grew up around the 1960s will enjoy this trip down memory lane!

4 years ago

Bill Moore, Writer

Norman-born Bill Moore spent four decades as a newspaper reporter and P.R. guy, writing at least 900 gazillion words in Texas, Washington, D.C., Singapore and New Zealand.
READ MORE
HOMEABOUT BILL
linkedin facebook pinterest youtube rss twitter instagram facebook-blank rss-blank linkedin-blank pinterest youtube twitter instagram